Tuesday, December 1, 2020

“Just the way you are” by Bruno Mars — er — Rihanna?

March 15, 2012 by  
Filed under Fat Talk, Featured, Self Esteem

Every time I hear “Just the way you are” by Bruno Mars I get ticked off.

Why do women need someone to tell us we are beautiful, or funny, or skinny, or whatever? Why can’t we just stand on our own? Why can’t we take a compliment?

The really pathetic part about this song is it is TRUE.

LyndaCarterWonderWoman We are the real dealWe ask our partners “Do I look ok? Do I look fat? Am I pretty? And on and on and on and on.” Think about how tired that must be for a guy.

I’d like you to read how totally ridiculous this song would be if say it was sung by…say.. Rihanna. Envision she is singing this for a guy. Below I have replaced “She” with “He” and the word “beautiful” with “handsome,” along with subtle commentary in italics.

Trust me, there is no guy on the planet that would relate to this song.

But as women we do. Enough already ladies.

The next time you are told you are pretty, respond appropriately with a loud, crass “Yes I am!”

When someone gives you a compliment, the appropriate response is “Thank you.” Try it next time and see how you feel (instead of telling the person they are nuts).

And please. Stop asking if you look fat already.

No guy is going to tell you the truth and its really annoying. I personally ban all fat chat in my life. My friends know that I just don’t go there so they can go off whining elsewhere. When they accept themselves, start loving themselves for WHO they are, we can talk. I don’t care to clutter up my positive thoughts and vibes with their dark cloud of ugliness.

And finally, remember you are the one and only. You were made as a unique being with amazing strengths and abilities, so stop staring at the cellulite on your thighs and move on with the thing called life.

Rhianna’s Version of Just The Way You Are.

Oh his eyes, his eyes
Make the stars look like they’re not shining
His hair, his hair
Falls perfectly without him trying

He’s so handsome
And I tell him every day (stalker alert)

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment him
He wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think he don’t see what I see (yes, it is, why is that?)

But every time he asks me do I look okay (stop it already!)
I say;

When I see your face
There’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile (whoa…back off psycho chick)
Cause boy you’re amazing
Just the way you are

His lips, his lips
I could kiss them all day if he’d let me (he wants more than a kiss babe)
His laugh, his laugh
He hates but I think its so sexy

He’s so handsome
And I tell him every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you’re searching for
Then just stay the same (Amen)


8 Responses to ““Just the way you are” by Bruno Mars — er — Rihanna?”
  1. .C. says:

    This is an interesting post. I guess sometimes I think I am the only one who does that – refutes a compliment; just can’t accept it. But it is other women too. Thanks for pointing that out, MamaV. I will try to do this.


    • mamaV says:

      Hi C. : So any compliments come your way yet?? Remember, a simple “thank you,” will do…let me know how it feels. 🙂

  2. Jen says:

    I do agree with some points that you make, like the huge frustration that some women need to be complimented. And I love that you ban fat-talk, as I find myself increasingly p’d off with “friends” who have nothing else to talk about!

    I don’t necessarily think that it’s the song’s fault though… [I know it’s not exactly what you said, but I feel it’s implied from your tone]. I think it’s written as a love song, and it resonates with men and women, mainly because men think women are beautiful whatever they do when they are in love. But I think more than the song being a love song, or whatever, it’s written to make money. I watched a documentary on the BBC last night about people writing a ballad, it was very forced, and a point was made that the best/most successful songs come from the heart, or what someone was feeling.

    What do you think about P!nk’s song F*cking Perfect? Does that annoy you in equal measures because we need to be told that we’re perfect? Same ultimate message, but from a different standpoint.

    • mamaV says:

      I see your point, I think I don’t take Bruno seriously. His latest songs are getting more and more preposterous….but I gotta admit they are catchy and I like them!

      LOVE P!nk F*cking Perfect, doesn’t it just hit the nail right on the head? The video is great too. Check out words from P!nk here, she talks about how she knew she would ruffle feathers with the video but she backs it up with wisdom on how important it is to communicate these things http://mamavision.com/2011/01/27/man-i-love-pnk-new-vid-fkin-perfect/

      Take care!!

  3. Love the Rihanna rendition.

    It’s amazing how right you are. How ridiculous must women sound to constantly be doubting themselves because of their appearance? Putting it in a male perspective really makes this apparent. Great post!

    • mamaV says:

      Hi Petite Spiel (what does that mean BTW?)

      Glad you liked it, I was visualizing her singing to Chris Brown, which made it even more ridiculous given the circumstance.

      Its like — if we could all just get a self esteem injection that would be the answer. Someone probably is working on that potion somewhere?!


  4. Melissa says:

    I see your point about how ridiculous it would be if the song were written by a man but I don’t think the song lyrics are bad; in fact–given all the songs that basically just talk about women as sex objects, this one (even if it’s written just to make money) really encourages women to love themselves as they are and, frankly, coming from a man’s perspective … it resonates. Maybe I’m nuts but I dig the lyrics and feel like they are a self-esteem boost for women of our generation who nitpick their every “flaw.” Not that we need to be validated by anyone … but it’s always nice to hear we are loved and accepted for who we are.

    • mamaV says:

      Great point, and I do agree with you. You always bring the softer side that just doesn’t exist in my psyche. LOL

      Hope you are well with that little angel of yours!

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